Curating Everyday Elegance

Elegance holds a timeless allure for those who wish to embody everyday sophistication and a refined lifestyle. It is more than just a taste for the finer things and it isn’t confined to luxury hotels or black tie affairs, it lives in the way we move through our everyday with intention, beauty, and quiet luxury. Curating elegance is subtle and is often found in the small details such as a well chosen outfit, a thoughtfully arranged space, a beautiful cup and saucer to enjoy a tea or coffee, or the calm of a morning ritual. It’s about making elevated choices in how we choose to live and the beauty we create in our thoughts, style, and surroundings. Curating elegance in the everyday provides a deeper appreciation for the subtle layers of beauty that surrounds us and refines our experiences to feel more luxurious.

Choose Timeless

Cashmere sweaters, fine art, historic estates, a pair of neutral colored high heel shoes, classical music, crystal glasses, a handwritten note, silk scarves, matches to light a candle, hotel cocktail bars, operas, symphonies, and pearl or diamond earrings are all examples of timelessness. When making choices for your everyday life be more discerning and find ways to add timeless beauty to your lifestyle, objects, and surroundings. What will once take practice in making these choices intentionally will eventually become more natural and soon you will have an eye for detail for selecting timeless options.

Carry Yourself With Poise

Poise is another attribute that lends itself to everyday elegance, but is also a skill that needs to be practiced. Have good posture when sitting and standing. Practice emotional discipline to stay calm and composed. Learn proper etiquette and execute it gracefully. Move at a leisurely pace. Practice good decorum. And choose your words carefully.

Light With Intention

One element that is often overlooked in curating everyday elegance is lighting. Whether you are at home, the office, or in a hotel room, learn the art of sophisticated lighting and how to utilize it to create an atmosphere of elegance. The best way to do this is first never turn on an overhead light. An overhead light is too harsh and bright to be elegant and often feels more like one is in a big box store than a sophisticated home. Bring in beautiful lamps to light common areas and cozy corners, yes, even in the kitchen. If you work at an office like I do, bring in a lamp or two with warm lighted bulbs to help neutralize florescent lights. While traveling do not turn on the overhead lights, use the table lamps or other lighting elements they may have provided. Elegance permeates from the outside in, and when the environment is elevated then we are better able to embody elegance.

Practice Sophisticated Eloquence

Eloquence is the quality of being graceful and effective in communication. To practice this skill learn to soften and modulate your voice and laughter. Learn to give and take compliments graciously. Master the art of being a good conversationalist and an active listener. Practice using more sophisticated phrases. For example, instead of saying “thanks a lot” try saying “I truly appreciate your time” or instead of “that’s cool” say “that’s quite fascinating”. Learn more elegant phrases and practice them to replace what you would like to improve upon.

Use Beautiful Everyday Objects

Throughout the day we are using many objects for various tasks. Whether it’s a pen and note pad to write something down, a cup and saucer for tea/coffee, measuring spoons for a recipe, matches to light a candle, a robe for after a shower, or a glass for water. Using beautiful everyday objects is a simple way to cultivate everyday elegance through the items that are utilized on a day-to-day basis. Choosing a timeless, real pen versus a plastic one may seem inconsequential in the moment, but it is a way of elevating everyday moments into a more elegant affair where beauty is appreciated and sophistication is easier to embody.

Embrace Elegant Rituals

As a quick reminder, routine is what you do, ritual is how you do it. There are things that we do everyday that are routine such as getting ready for the day, eating a meal, doing life admin, etc. To elevate everyday routines incorporate elegant rituals around the things you do everyday. While getting ready in the morning prepare a beautiful carafe of water to sip on, play light jazz or instrumental music in the background, and light a scented candle. For dinner set the table with beautiful linens and cloth napkins, light a candle or two for the table, and enjoy the art of conversation if you have someone who dines with you. Life admin can be refined too by putting on some elegant music, making a hot tea in a beautiful cup and saucer set, using a beautiful pen and stationary and elevating the moment into a most elegant affair.

Enjoy Fresh Flowers

“I must have fresh flowers. always, and always”- Claude Monet. Claude Monet’s quote reflects his deep appreciation for flowers and their ability to bring beauty, color, and joy into life. This too lends itself to everyday elegance. You need not spend a lot of money on this either as you can simply pick up a small bouquet from the grocery store for $5-$10 and simply place them in a vase. Flowers are nature’s Dior and no matter where you put them in your home, you will have instant elegance wherever they are.

Slow Down Your Movements

Moving with intention adds an air of ease and grace that creates an elegant presence whether in public or at home. If you have been in the presence of an elegant, sophisticated woman you may have noticed that her movements are slow and gentle. She possesses poise in her gestures, posture, and gentle smile. This a free element of everyday elegance that one can cultivate simply through practice. Start by practicing at home as this is where we tend to form our habits and then when you are out in public this deportment will simply be a part of your natural poise.

Dress Elegantly, Even at Home

“Dressing well is a form of good manners.” -Tom Ford. A quote to appreciate from one of the world’s most elegant dressers. Tom Ford’s quote demonstrates respect for oneself and others by honoring the occasion and the people present. Dressing elegantly shows consideration and self respect by putting effort into a polished appearance. Let this also be true at home too. Invest in lounge wear that is elegant such as matching sets, elegant pajamas, comfortable trousers, slightly oversized button downs and sweaters.

Keep A Hand Written Journal

The act of writing by hand slows your thoughts and adds intentionality to your day. Elegance is portrayed in the act of sitting down with a hot drink, a beautiful pen and journal, some instrumental music, and then to write with intention. Whether you journal for gratitude, about dreams of the future, about the person you want to be, or to simply clarify the thoughts that you have, hand writing in a journal is a way to slow down and create an elegant ritual about something that is a simple pleasure and also deeply personal.

Play Soft Background Music

Soft, instrumental background music creates an elegant atmosphere and elevates ordinary moments like cooking, dining, journaling, enjoying a hot bath, or reading. There’s a reason why I mention this element several times throughout the post and that is because soft background music sets the stage for elegance. Whether you prefer jazz, classical, or more modern contemporary music, the act of putting on background music will create everyday elegance no matter what is taking place.

Use Cloth Napkins and Real Dishes

Incorporating cloth napkins and real dishes into your daily mealtime routine is a simple yet impactful way to bring a sense of everyday elegance to your meals. Beyond their environmental benefits, these timeless touches elevate even the most causal dinner into a more intentional experience. It’s about honoring the ordinary and creating beauty in the rituals we often rush through. By choosing real materials over disposable ones, you transform each meal into a quiet celebration of home and presence.

Maintain Well Groomed Hands

Well groomed hands are a subtle yet powerful expression of elegance. Our hands are constantly on display and they quietly speak volumes about how we care for ourselves. Clean, moisturized hands and nails signal self respect and refined presence. You don’t need an elaborate manicure to appear put together; consistency and care are what matter most. Prioritizing hand care is a small daily ritual that reinforces a sense of personal dignity and adds a quiet confidence to your presence.

Create Elegant Rituals Around Transitions

Lighting a candle at dusk, playing music when you finish work, changing clothes after coming home, doing a nighttime skincare routine – these small elegant shifts anchor your day in beauty and rhythm. They add a sense of elegant intention and calm to the flow of your day. These small moments, while often overlooked, are powerful opportunities to reconnect with yourself. Creating these elevated rituals when done consistently and with care, become anchors of everyday elegance. They are subtle, soothing cues that bring beauty, presence, and sophistication into everyday life.